Allow Yourself To Be Forgiven

Allow Yourself To Be Forgiven

This was not the topic I intended to talk about today. I had thoughts about people surprising you and the magic there of but some things happened which left me upset and this strolled into my mind.

I don’t know how hard you are on yourself but if you’re not a narcist chances are you are too hard on yourself.

I am often able to divest myself of the negative feelings of failure and malady. Guilt trips slide off my back like water from the back of a duck. Large, critical problems that fill others with existential dread often illicit a mild shrug from me. It’s not that I don’t care, it’s that I don’t allow such negative feelings to attach to me or sink in.

Unless, of course, those negative feelings are attacks I level at myself. In such instances even the smallest of mistakes will haunt me for years to come. Amusingly it is the small ones that I find least forgivable.

However I know that were I to confide in my loved ones they would tell me to let go of these malicious feelings. I know this because I tell them the same thing when they confide such pain in me.

The problem is forgiveness, of the self. Of being able to look, honestly, at the mistakes you’ve made and the pain you’ve caused and accepting that you can be forgiven your misdeeds. That you have earned forgiveness.

It is not for us to say when we have paid our debt to others but it is for us to say when we have paid our debt to ourselves and pushing that payment forever into the future does you no service. It not only adds to the misery of your life but it prevents you from growing from your pain. From growing past your self inflicted pain.

So, I will endeavor to forgive myself, and I ask that you endeavor to forgive yourself and if it helps in anyway know that I forgive you too.

Thank you my dear readers and God bless;

~S. Wallace